Everyday

Everyday i think of you. Most of the times i feel sorry for all the things that i did, all the times i was selfish i was self-centered and a total ass. I wonder what could have happened had i not done those things.Some other times, i think of you and remember the times we spent together and i smile , which in a little while turns into an overwhelming sadness that i can never be with you. I try to numb this pain in every way possible but it always returns and i am rendered helpless.
I know that i never deserved you, but i also know that in a life mired in debauchery ,impurity and the pursuit of easy pleasure, my feelings for you are my rare moments of purity. I wonder if its a good thing that you happened or not. On the one hand I have never felt as lost as without you now. I have never felt so dejected and disappointed i myself. I have never doubted myself as i do after you left.On the other hand the time spent with you is the only time i have been truly happy and i know that you happening is a once in a lifetime thing, something which i will always remember and cherish, long after my mourning is over.
And everyday i wish for a miracle, that you will come back and people who hope fervently for miracles to happen live painfully melancholic lives.

Photo by red twolips