How to not get over a girl in 500 days

I recently watched this movie, 500 days of summer and well loved it. The story line is simple. Boy meets girl.Boy falls in love.Girl doesnt. What follows after this is not pretty. So as a service to mankind(literally)I thought i will just list all the things that you should not do while trying to get over someone.

1. I can get her back
"Yes, i can get her back. She was in love with me once and she can fall in love again with me. After all we shared something special. I look back and cant imagine what went so wrong that its not fixable. " This is a rookie mistake.If she has to come back, she will. But in most cases she wont, so stop fixating on this.If she says its over it is. And about not figuring out what went so horribly wrong as the sister in 500 days of summer says "Look back."

2. We can still be friends
"We were such good friends. Maybe we can be friends.And you think in brackets(Who knows what might happen)." Again bull crap.Until you stop thinking who knows what might happen you can never be friends. Break off contact for a little while.Enjoy the other things in life. enjoy the company of your friends and that book you always wanted to read.And maybe then when you are really over her you can be friends.

3. She's not her
"She's pretty , smart and intelligent and all but she's not her."This is a possible stage 3. Yes she's not. She's a different person. Also remember inspite of her being "her" it did not quite work out for you, right.

4. Throwing yourself at everyone
"if only i find someone else i will be happy, so i will work overtime to get a girlfriend". This is another possible stage 3 and no you wont.You would probably get rejected and which will lead to depression and for some weird reason you will end up calling your ex late at night further alienating her.

5.I can get her back -2
Yes this stage can come back and bite you in the ass. After both possible stages 3 (or they may happen after each other) you think its some big cosmic conspiracy for the two of you to be together. Its not. The universe doesnt care about you. Know that.

6. Is she seeing that guy?
"Why are there so many comments/likes from my girl on this guy's facebook page? Why doesnt she pick up the phone? Is she seeing that guy?" So you are cyberstalking your ex and notice irrefutable evidence that she's definitely interested in some guy. Well, probably she isor in most cases she's not. Step 1 :Stop tapping her facebook feeds. Step 2: Get a life.

7. Is she still single
"Is she still single? Yeah why? Probably she's still not over me." Sorry mate. aint so. Probably you were such a huge car crash that she's still recuperating.

8. What went wrong?
While a post-mortem is good after every stage of your project, its not so good if you do it after a breakup and specially if you ask her, what went wrong. Dont open the pandora's box. Such bile may come out that you may not be able to take it.You will probably need a stiff drink just to get sober again.

9. Blogged: How wonderful was she?
If you are a amateur blogger, you will probably write a couple of blogs romanticizing your relationship, in the hope that she might some day come across it and realize how much you truly loved her and welcome you back in her arms. Not gonna happen. There was a poet called ghanananda in the 15th century. He was in love with a courtesan named sujan who betrayed him in a way.After that every poem he wrote he mentioned her in it. I doubt he was ever able to get over her. Get the drift!!

10. I can get her back -3
So you come across old chats with her on gmail. The good chats. Then you start reminsicing and that old bugger comes back. No mate, not possible.Its been 500 days and you have been relegated to the history books. Move on dude!!

I am sure there are a lot of other things you can do- watch lots of boy meet girl movies,bring her up in every conversation you have with a totally uninterested friend, keep all the stuff she gave you and look at it whenever you are sad,Call her up every time you get drunk. And this will definitely guarantee you dont get over her. But then when you find yourself writing a blogpost at 4:30 in the morning one and half years later; dont blame me.

You have been warned!!